I remember that night 20 years ago

I was...11, going for 12. My parents had just said good night, they were back from a party and as always, I was awake until they came home. And as always I was listening at the radio, as I´ve done since I was a toddler. (I don´t like total silence you see, it freaks me out)
Suddenly the music was interrupted and a shaky voice announced that the Swedish Prime Minister Olof Palme had been shot.
I froze and listened. Then I got up and told my parents. They thought I was joking and turned the radio on. And there the news was again. It was real, it had happened where you´d never thought something like that could.

Seven years later I was in the US in the fall. 30 years had past since JFK had been shot and I heard all kinds of stories, describing what I felt 20 years ago. Fear, shock, anger.
This year it´ll also be 3 years since they showed up again, when Swedish Minister of Foreing Affairs Anna Lindh was killed.

It´s a mad world out there. And it´s weird how those crystal clear moments scar your whole being, those moments when the world seem to spin the wrong way around, like a confused marble out of orbit.

Boring old fart, gold and attention issue

Feel like I´ve becomed boring old fart for not blogging. And it´s such a lame excuse - but the truth, however boring it may be, is that I´ve been working my ass off and when not, I´ve been sleeping.
I love my job, I totally love all the stuff I have the opportunity to do, but it also takes lots of energy. And since I´m on the phone, at the photographer, meeting people and attending at presentations most of the time of day, I do almost all work in the evenings. Which results in getting to bed in the wee hours and then up early.
But I shall not whine about it because I love it.

This Sunday was a bliss, actually it seems like there might be something called spring around the corner. And a nice trip too, maybe...
Coolest thing of today was the Swedish victory in the Olympics hockey final - äääntligen!!!
´02 it was a scandal, not good at all. But now the vikings showed what they´re made of.
Hopefully the Swedish football (that´s soccer for you over there across the Atlantic) team will work miracles at this years championship in Germany.

Now if you´ll excuse me I have to catch some beauty sleep, can´t really look like a tired old fart ass if I´m supposed to be a beauty reporter, can I?

I´ll end this post with some gossip: Got slightly tipsy at friends place this friday (man, you should see the girls place, it´s STUNNING! Totally stylish!) and got the very bright idea of texting Mr Norway. Stooopid thing to do. Am such an attention whore.
Anyhow, it was a very cool text, just wondering wassup. And actually he called me yesterday but I missed his call since I was sleeping very, very heavily. And he didn´t leave a message. Well, whatever, it´s not like I´m dying to see him, guess I´m only in it for the playing around attention thing.

True

Don´t you just love this?! It´s like soooo true for all the sexes, but the last sentence, haha.

Superlovely list

This blog has been far too gloomy, time to live it up a bit with a nice list. Found it on Annas blogg feat. Mel E, here goes - in swedish though, sorry:
KLÄDER
1. Vad använder du just nu för jacka? En svart fuskpäls som jag vintagefyndade 2003.
2. Vad använder du just nu för skor? Stövlar från Vagabond, Fornarina, etc.
3. Favoritfärg på kläder? Svart.
4. Favoritmaterial på kläder? Naturmaterial, helt klart.
5. Vilka kläder skulle du vilja ha just nu? Luellas kollektion för Target.
6. Favoritaffärer? Hehehe....
7. Favoritmärke? Dolce & Gabbana.
GREJER
1. Vad har du för:
2. Plånbok? En orange sak i skinn, köpt på marknaden i Ventimiglia.
3. Smycken? Idag: halsband från Vanja, D&G-klocka, örhängen från Zanzlöza, silverring köpt på Camdenmarknaden.
4. Solglasögon? Ett par vintagefynd.
5. Nagellack? Frostigt rosa.
6. Mp3? En rosa Creative Zen Micro.
7. Mobil? Nokia 7260 i svart.
BLANDAT
1. Vad har du i din:
a) Jackficka just nu? Inget.
b) Handväska eller liknande just nu? Kalender, massa pennor, anteckningsböcker, plånbok, tre läppglans, tuggummi, ögondroppar.
2. Vad är du beroende av? Glossies.
3. Vilken sorts lipsyl använder du? Carmex.
4. Vad tror du på? Karma.
5. Vad köpte du senast? En vidrigt snygg tidskriftsamlare.
6. Har du nåt husdjur? Nej, men jag funderar på att skaffa en katt!
7. Vad bor du i? Hyresrättetta.

Weltschmerz

Just read this DN-article about the experiences of Roméo Dallaire, a UN-general in Rwanda during the genocide. Made med feel even more sick, like - here I am in my privileged little bubble whining about shit like having a hangover or loads of work to finish, when stuff like this is actually happening in the world without bigger forces trying to end it.

The following sentence also made me remember yesterday: "För Roméo Dallaire blev det ytterligare ett tecken på att vi lever i en rasistisk värld - även om rasismen ofta är undermedveten."
You tell me.

Sickening

Man, what a dramatic evening....!
Am such good friend I had totally forgotten about my friend T´s party tonight. Suddenly he called and wondered when I was going to show up and reminded me that I had r.s.v.p´d him that I would. Damn...there I was in tracksuit, working and looking forward to an efficient and calm evening. The complete schlagerextravaganza earlier this week had the best and worse of me and I felt like the alcoholconsumption of that evening was enough to last for the rest of this month at least.

But you don´t just diss a friends party. Specially not a sweetheart as T is and we hadn´t hung out since fall. We actually dated a couple of times but I got myself out of it, I just didn´t feel like committing to someone else but myself for a while. Anyhow, after a quick shower, closet rummage and make up, I was ready to go. Decided I´d just have mineral water the whole evening and stuck to it, since I wasn´t going to get more work done I wanted to feel fresh on sunday morning.

The party was great until this girl suddenly starts talking to me about immigrants. Don´t know what I´ve been irradiating lately, since a lot of people have addressed questions of this type to me. Well, the girl starts asking me stuff like "Do you know why that people [of a certain origin] always behave like that?" and saying stuff like "No wonder they´re always on Efterlyst". A very nice talk. I just listened to her going on with her racist comments soooo obviously trying to provoke me.

Good thing I didn´t have a drink, otherwise she´d probably had a close up of my ringclad uppercut. This time I held my calm, probably because I was so tired I just didn´t have any energy to waste on such a total asshole. When I had enough of her crap I recalled one of my favourite movie quotes ever (many thanks to Brian de Palma & Al Pacino) and to my astonishment I managed to deliver it perfectly!
With a smile I graciously asked her: "You know what? Why don´t you stick your head up your ass and see if it fits?".

I then walked out of the room, thanked T for a nice party and called a cab. T got upset and wanted to know why I was leaving. My answer before I left? "Ask your sweet friend with the blue dress". Total poised dramaqueen. When I was in the cab on my way home he called. Obviously someone had told the stupid asshole in the blue dress that T and I had dated and she had gotten all jealous and acted out on me. When T asked her whattef ' had happened, she´d asked him right up front why he´d dated an "immigrant slut" like me. He had asked her to leave right then and there.

Well, at least I got home in time to curl up in tracksuit and watch Ice-T in Law & Order Special Units. And to get this sickening episode out of my system.

Juanes to the people

While getting my daily dosis of my favourite blog ever, I read that she (?!) also likes Juanes, what a coincidence! I guess great minds think alike or it might be as simple as the world is now ready for the next big colombian thing.

And for you (english, swedish or other languages that pronounce J like Y) his name is pronounced "Huanes".
And he is very, very, cute.

Back on bookreviewer track

Lovely! I will be reviewing books again. Have actually missed it a bit but have been quite busy with other stuff to do, but it´ll be great to be back on track and up to date with what´s cooking in the wonderful world of books.

Meet the vampiress

Saw myself in the mirror, wasn´t that suprised really but nonetheless I freaked a bit:
Pale, dark circles under the eyes and that somewhat crazed vampyre look that Christopher Lee does so well when playing Dracula. I should really try to get some serious sleep. Or maybe it´s not sleep I need but some red liquid.

Killing me and not softly

Am so hungover I´d gladly cut my head off and chop it in tiny pieces. Just discussed with x that I should know by now, I mean, I´m not 18 anymore, nor 20 or 25. Guess I just have to face the fact that I´m an old fartass with a habit. Who wakes up and finds that obviously it barfed in the sink sometime in the wee hours. Bloody good fun yesterday though, and now isn´t that what it´s all about, folks?!
Now if you excuse me, I think I have to puke again.

Style dictators de luxe

People, specially girls, have been blogging about style forever. It´s like everybody´s doing it. And so I´ve succumbed to peer pressure and joined the masses.
But not alone.
Together with my fabulously creative genious of a friend Be, who is a genuine creative catalyst, we´ll write about style and other stuff at Stildiktaturen de Luxe. It´s in Swedish though, which will be great good fun to write in.

Very proud daughter

My father was on TV - again!
When Eagle Eye Cherry, one of the hosts of the Grammisgala was to be announced, there were comments from a lot of people saying something about him, among them my dad! Really, really cool, I was sooo proud.
And relieved that he didn´t have to say something about Håkan Hellström or similar.

Boy, oh boy!

Got the sweetest text yesterday before heading out for brunch and socializing: "You´ve got a new friend named Lukas, his weight is three kg and he is 49 cm"
It´s a boy! And I´m really, really happy for my friends and their family!

Homies + cava = brilliant

Hanging out with kompisar från förr is always great good fun! Add to that nice food and cava and the result is brilliant. Didn´t have the energy to party afterwards though, so they dropped me of on the way downtown. Normally I´d walk home but yesterday there had been warnings about a raper in the hood, which led to us texting and phoning everyone to make sure all got home safe. Made me quite mad though, why should we have to fear shit like that, in our neighbourhood or anywhere?

During dinner of course we reminisced a lot of shit that happened when we grew up, good, bad and very entertaining shit. And some sad shit too when thinking of people that isn´t anymore. When it all comes around, it´s just like the song - or the other way around, the song is just like life morelike: "....några lyckas, några dör"

Despite of that I´m really glad we grew up in an overall quite nice suburb close to the city and not in a godforgiven small place where people know your every move and are dangerously familiarly linked to eachother. Although this city is quite small for being a capital, it´s big enough to be somehow anonymous.

Don´t ever want to be without your music Ms Blige!

Have been listening to The Breakthrough on and on and on and on today (again) and I´ll be damned! I never get tired of it.

My icon since first time I heard totally brilliant Real Love, just gets better, better and better.

All my respect to you Ms Blige, you´re greatest by far, musicwise, stylewise, divawise, everything!

Show offs

My father and I have this kind of silent competition about who´s most exposed in the media. And I have to admit that he´s winning, by far. Not that I don´t think it´s cool that people find him interesting, the thing is I just don´t like to lose. I know, I´m terrible!

Now my dad´s been filmed by Tv4 (again!) for something related to the Swedish Grammys: Grammisgalan. The only Grammy event I watch is the Latino Grammy Award show, but this tuesday I´ll definitely watch to see if my fathers bright smile appears.

Quitapena

That´s spanish for "take away the grief" and is something you do when somebody dies. Usually after the funeral you have something to drink and remember the one that´s no longer there.

A couple of weeks ago I got the sad news that a friends mother had passed away and that was the reason of yesterdays Quitapena. I suggested it, since I felt I really wanted to see my friend and her husband and just hang out and talk. Two other friends also joined us, and also friends to the family. Very nice evening despite the sad reason for it.

I got home in the small hours and got the brilliant idea of calling my grandmother. So I did and we talked for a couple of hours, as always. I miss my grandmother, I really have to get my act together and visit her soon. Sometimes I really, really hate the fact that I´m living so far away from her that I just can´t go visit over the weekend or similiar.

Today I feel like I´ve been smashed against a wall or something. Not good. Am trying to sober up, guess I´m allowed to have a deli pizza for lunch today, yeeey!